Ken's House of Pancakes

I was doubtful that a pancake house would be worth writing about, and I wasn’t all that excited about gorging myself on a heavy breakfast given that later in the day we’d be driving 9000 feet to Mauna Kea, and perhaps higher. Who knew how a big breakfast would sit that high up? In the ether, would my body be able to digest so much food while dealing with the mountain’s thin air? And what would happen if Mauna Kea erupted and, weighed down with breakfast, we had to run, or more likely waddle, for our lives?

Ah, but it turned out to be little more than my normal paranoia. Ken’s House of Pancakes basically blew me away. I never knew that eggs could be so damn good. I have no idea what they feed chickens on the Big Island, but it must be a gourmet version of…whatever chickens eat.

To begin with, I want to say this: Ken’s House of Pancakes serves the best omelets I’ve probably ever had in my life. My wife ordered the “Hombre omelet,” which consisted of Portuguese sausage, onions, green peppers, and Ken’s famous “Homemade Spanish Sauce,” and came with a very reasonably sized, and thankfully airy, side of pancakes. I’m guessing that my wife’s order, after factoring out the plate, weighed nearly 5% of her body weight. The omelet was advertised as being made from three eggs, but, had I not known this, I would’ve guessed six. We’re talking a monster omelet, large enough to encase an average, normally proportioned chicken and all the cutlery we’d need to eat it.

I, on the other hand, ignorant as I was of the otherworldly eggs I was about to discover, went with the French toast, which was somewhat dry and chewy—while I love the thick “Portuguese sweet bread” they use, that’s the tradeoff one too often makes, I suppose. My wife was unable to finish her entire Hombre, so, being the chivalrous sort—and a human disposal when it comes to leftover food—I devoted myself, with lustful abandon, to what was left of her omelet.

Despite appearances, the eggs were quite light—for an additional 75¢ you can order Egg Beaters to substitute for eggs—and the omelet was filled to bursting with extras. But there was a flavor to the eggs that was amazing, prompting me to comment to my wife that they must add sugar to them. Not that the omelet was sweet, but how else to explain such surprisingly delicious eggs? I mean, aren’t eggs just…eggs? My wife disagreed with me about the sugar, but she couldn’t offer any other explanation. And it wasn’t the influence of other ingredients because, when we returned two days later and ordered something different, the eggs had the same great taste. Maybe it’s all the vog in the air.

Ken’s attracts its fair share of tourists, in large part because it’s a Big Island institution and can be found in most guidebooks. But there were enough locals there, too, that you knew the place passed muster. The locals on either side of our table, and I mean no offense by this, were possibly three times the size of my wife and I. Oddly enough, that’s exactly what impressed me; if these people were regulars, surely their corpulence spoke volumes about Ken’s food. If I lived on the Big Island, I’m sure I’d balloon up in no time because I’d be having breakfast at Ken’s several times a week.

When we returned to Ken’s two days later, eschewing all the other good breakfast options we knew Hilo offered, I quickly succumbed to the powerful hold Ken’s eggs had on me and ordered the “Mauna Loa Scramble”—scrambled eggs with onions, green peppers, mushrooms, and spinach, while my wife shifted in a slightly healthier direction than before and ordered the “Vegetarian Omelet” (filled with mushrooms, spinach, bell peppers, onions, and tomatoes). Again, the eggs, perfectly cooked, won us over, and the coffee carafe we emptied was an ideal amount to help the food go down.

Ken’s, which has been fattening happy customers 24/7 since 1971, has been recognized both locally and nationally for its food. It’s been cleaning up on the Big Island’s breakfast scene, being named “Best Breakfast” for twelve years in a row and counting. USA Today also named Ken’s one of the “Top Ten Diners in the Nation” as well as having one of the “Top Ten Waitress Staffs in the Nation.” The service was, in fact, excellent. The waitresses all dressed in parrot greens and yellows and had old, 60s hairdos; their attentiveness was the best we came across on the Big Island.

I know this sounds strange, but Ken’s has definitely earned its stripes with their eggs. Their menu, which holds its own with the lengthiest Chinese menus around, offers good value; their omelets mostly ranged between $8 and $13—very reasonable considering what you get. They also boast a variety of appetizers, sandwiches, chili and soups, salads, dinner entrees, and a “Keiki Corner” for kids.

Ken’s House of Pancakes is located at 1730 Kamehameha Avenue. Call (808) 935-8711 for take out orders and catering. Parking is extremely limited, but there’s enough turnover that you can usually find a spot if you’re patient.

Open 24 hours!

Cafe 100

Cafe 100 is a beacon of Hilo's old diner scene. A dim beacon, perhaps, but one, if the line of patrons we saw was representative, whose light will never completely fade out. There's not much to Cafe 100. It looks like a boardwalk diner that was pushed inland a couple miles by the two tsunamis that hit Hilo last century. And the prices are so low that they seem to have come from the same era. This alone may explain the popularity of the place; however, as other Internet reviews attest, over the years many locals have clearly developed a fierce loyalty to Cafe 100's menu, which is not for the weak of heart (medically speaking, that is). Before I go on, understand that I love big, hearty breakfasts as much as anyone. But I also try not to throw my health out the window when I eat.

My wife made me come here. She was gung-ho on loco moco, the prospect of which -- the name, after all, means "crazy mucous" in Spanish -- scared the hell out of me. The reason I went along was because of Cafe 100's history. It's been around since 1946 and, as I said above, survived two tsunamis. What's more, many people support its claim as the creator of loco moco, a signature Island dish. Besides, how many times do I get to the Big Island? Not often enough, unfortunately. As expected, my wife ordered the classic loco moco -- rice, a hamburger patty drowned in gravy, and a fried egg on top -- for $1.99. She ooh-ed and aah-ed over the first bite or two, but it quickly became too much for her. Lending her my support, I nibbled on her order a little, but I suddenly flashed back thirty years to the hamburger lunches I sometimes ordered at my elementary school cafeteria, which I suspect sickened every student at least once. Swallowing down my soft, mushy forkful, I wished my wife good luck finishing her meal. With my fingers on her wrist to test her pulse as she ate, I went back to my own breakfast, an English muffin that hugged a huge, thin slice of ham, fried egg, and slice of American cheese, and quickly lost myself in its greasy goodness. I could have easily eaten two. I probably ought to add that Cafe 100's coffee was insanely cheap, too...and tasted like it. If your taste buds are shot, it's a great deal.

Even if you're not a fan of loco moco -- and many people are -- for $1.99 you really can't complain. If nothing else, you can eat around the hamburger, then take it home, wash it off, set it aside with a bun, cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, a slice of pineapple, and whatever condiments you like, and eat it later. Two meals for $1.99? For me, that's what would make me come back for loco moco. I'm sure Cafe 100 diehards would love to punch me in the face for saying these things, but maybe they'll take solace in the fact that I loved the Big Island's best-known pancake house.

Cafe 100 does have a fairly wide-ranging menu, and customers can order various mixed plate lunches that come with generous portions and sides of macaroni or potato salad, one or two scoops of rice, and even kim chee. If you really want to try loco moco, I might recommend other places. Although it's a signature Island dish, there's a lot of variety in loco moco recipes, and if you're hungry, there's sure to be one to satisfy you.

Cafe 100 is located at 969 Kilauea Avenue in Hilo. Call (808) 935-8683 or (808) 935-6368 for takeout orders and catering. Cash only.

Hours:

Sunday-Thursday: 6 a.m. - 8:30 p.m.

Friday-Saturday: 6 a.m. - 9:30 p.m.